Tory PPC falls at the first hurdle

The Prime Minister called the election today, and no doubt the entire every politically engaged person was running around and jumping up and down. I was stuck on BBC News until about 1130 before having to catch a flight.

I couldn’t help notice one little thing though, a press release from my favourite right-wing pinata, Tory Candidate for North East Somerset,  Jacob Rees-Mogg.

Now the election is on, it’s going to be a lot harder to hide from the media!

The release is pretty dull and biographical, though Jacob lives down to my expectations and lets us know what he’s really all about in the first paragraph:

Jacob Rees – Mogg was selected as candidate for the newly formed constituency of North East Somerset, (formerly Wansdyke), in 2007 thus fulfilling his ambition to represent the Somerset parliamentary seat in which his family has lived for generations.

So there we have it. He must already be the MP since he has fulfilled his ambition. He’s already won, and may have done so as long ago as 2007!

In fairness, it seems Rees-Mogg didn’t write this one himself (either). A quick look at the properties box of the word document reveals that it was written by someone at Northgate Information Systems. A quick googling suggests that this is a company based in Hemel Hempstead.

Normally I wouldn’t bother with this last bit, though it has caught out our dear JRM before, when he had a politically restricted council press officer to write his releases!

Rees-Mogg up to Krafty business again

It’s no secret that I’ve been quite vocal in my opposition to the Tory candidate in North-East Somerset, Jacob Rees-Mogg, so it will come as no surprise that through my suggestion box I’ve received an interesting piece of gossip from someone in and around parliament. (Signed “Placement Student”) I’m evidently quite occupied with French Elections right now, but see what you make of this:

Constituents may be shocked to learn that the Takeover Panel’s investigation of Kraft’s acquisition of Cadbury’s is NOT as a result of Rees-Mogg’s letter to them.

Of course Rees-Mogg wrote a letter to the panel, it is believed (so I am told) that the investigation was launched following a request from the Business, Innovation and Skills Dept as soon as the decision to close Somerdale was announced.

Obviously this was well before Rees-Mogg, late in the day, as ever, tried to do anything about this. What it all means is that having been utterly silent on the issue for several weeks Rees-Mogg has tried to bag the credit for precipitating something that was already in motion.

It is my understanding that The Takeover Panel DO NOT comment to the media or anybody else on what investigations they are carrying out. Therefore, news that they ARE investigating this can only have come from an unofficial source. I have no idea who this might be, but it could well be a case of “friends in the City”. Rees-Mogg cannot even have received a letter from the Panel saying so, because such documents do not exist.

To Rees-Mogg’s actual credit, as opposed to the credit he tends to claim, he’s very consistent in the way he works. Say nothing until you have to, then not just hop on, but pretend you were driving the bandwagon all along!

Another bungle by Tory candidate Rees-Mogg: claiming credit for Government’s success

Jacob Rees-Mogg, the Tory candidate for North East Somerset, has taken another significant step in reviving the British Gaffe Industry.

Presenting his latest blooper is always a difficult challenge. Though it’s fun to laugh at a hopelessly useless traditional out-of-touch Tory, it’s also important to remember he is selected for a super-marginal. This bloke could be an MP within months.

In addition to plagiarising The Sun, having council taxpayers’ resources used to promote him, forgetting where he really lives, and hoping for a recession to keep his gold valuable, (See the list!) now he’s put out another leaflet. Here’s the front:

smugg front

Rees-Mogg has at least learned one lesson and has started to write his own copy. You can tell it’s him because nobody else would start a statement on MPs’ Expenses by talking about Stuarts, Tudors, Shakespeare and MacBeth! It’s as if he is trying to strangle you with his Eton school tie. (Yes, he’s one of those Tories, don’t act surprised.)

The whole leaflet is amusingly awful, but there is something you should draw your attention to; on the back, where Rees-Mogg is attempting to trumpet some Tory successes. I’ve drawn a red ring around it:

smugg back

The start of a massive £2.5m overhaul of children’s play areas throughout the area, including Midsomer Norton.

The reference to the 2.5 million quid for play equipment is fascinating; I’m not sure whether it’s a mistake because he hasn’t got his facts right, was improperly briefed by the Tory Council, or if it’s just a classic lie.

In fact this £2.5 million is government money – nothing to do with B&NES, the Tories, or even B&NES Tories.

Back in April 2008 the government announced “Labour’s Children’s Plan” in which Bath & North East Somerset was selected as a “Pathfinder” one of just 20 authorities to get funding of this type, specifically to create new play areas for young people.

Jacob Rees-Mogg is claiming either that his Tory pals on the Council magically conjured up two and a half million pounds to fund play areas in order to match that of the government, or more likely just false credit-bagging for something they didn’t do.

Far from being a Tory success, I’d wager (£2.5 million, if I had it!) that B&NES was made a top priority area thanks to someone from Somerset lobbying the government, someone in government perhaps, like Labour MP Dan Norris, the very man Rees-Mogg is trying to oust!

To put it simply, for the likes of hard-of-thinking Tory candidates: The £2.5 million isn’t a Tory success but a Labour one!

Is it just a typical Tory trait that Jacob Rees-Mogg has tried to claim credit for something his rival has achieved?

More likely, I suspect that it’s another major blooper by an out-of-touch candidate who has become a gross embarrassment to the Tory Party!

Tory PPC: "It is about time we had a recession"

It is refreshing to be able to write something about Jacob Rees-Mogg which isn’t describing some idiotic gaffe.

Previously, he’s plagiarised the Sun, misappropriated council resources and claimed his house adjacent to Hyde Park makes him a local Somerset bloke. (See here for the list)

This time though, it’s worth exposing a more malicious side to who we usually dismiss as a comedy Tory.

BBC News ran a story at the beginning of the month (here), and a follow up story last week (here), on the price of gold, which explained that:

The precious metal reached a record high of more than $1,065 an ounce on Tuesday morning.

This is incredibly good news for the Tory PPC for North-East Somerset. In an interview with MoneyWeek, he said:

“The notes you take out of your pocket are worthless. Gold isn’t, though: it has rarity and it’s a store of value.”

Then he was asked if he had any specific tips, and told his chums:

Yes: buy gold. I keep a gold stock in all of my portfolios and think that they are still offering attractive value.

Looks like Rees-Mogg is (even further) in the money!

McRees-Mogg: Hooray for all my gold!

The most telling thing you will ever read about Jacob Rees-Mogg, more than all the gaffe, bloopers and mistakes he will ever make, is this response:

The strongest argument for gloom in the near future is that we have had 12 years of continuous growth and that has never happened before, so it is about time we had a recession.

Did you catch that? Read it again.

We need a recession because gold keeps its value, and I’ve got loads of it!

It says a lot about the Tory Party and how much they have / haven’t changed that they’re willing to let this man anywhere near Parliament.

You can see him now, with his notional constituents, talking about how he’s just like them trying to do everything he can in tough economic times, but really thinking about his lovely stacks of increasingly valuable gold, thanks to a recession he’d been waiting 12 years for.